Wednesday, 15 July 2009

Sexy ladies

I got the shock of my life when I popped in to tend my blog last night. There, just under my last post, was a large advert with a banner headline saying: 'Sexy Arab Ladies.' I must admit I did a double-take. How on earth had that got there? I am used to seeing the little Google ads running above the most recent post, a lot of which advertise moth killer or duvet cleaning services, which I find quite quaint and funny. Advertising sexy Arab ladies is quite another matter. Apart from anything else, it seems really racist.

I immediately removed the ad, but not before noticing that it had made $0.17 in one day. For me, this is a total fortune - I think in the whole of last year, I probably made $6 with my moth and duvet act. Nevertheless, I think I'll stay poor but happy - and honest.

I must admit I am baffled by the whole thing. No doubt I did click some button somewhere which enabled ads within the blog itself instead of just the small lines of type at the top. But I am sure I would have asked for content appropriate to the blog. Could those chaps at GoogleAds somehow have misunderstood my references to 'my girls' or to my own eternal search for True Love? Do they imagine I am running some sort of brothel in the leafy confines of Dulwich? Are my tales of angst at the school gates being looked on as some sort of extremely bizarre kinky foreplay?

Even if I were the madam of the world's least successful house of ill fame, I can't imagine who would come to my blog to replenish their stock of sexy ladies, of whatever racial background. The vast majority of my readers are women, mostly with children in tow. Occasionally, very, very occasionally, a man does reveal himself by leaving a comment, but I usually scare him away in double-quick time with my effortless natural talent at man-repelling. I don't think many of them hang around long enough to start feeling that they are in the mood for, ahem, lurrrve. If, though, the ad was for Sexy Women who can do the gardening or take the rubbish out, then maybe some of us ladies would be interested in a helping hand. No double entendres intended! Otherwise, forget it, Google ads.

Now, who's going to own up to clicking on that ad?

Right, I'm off to Argos to get a spade. Yes, it's non-stop sexy glamour escort girls here, I tell you. Just got to switch that red light off on the way out ....

22 comments:

Womanatwork said...

I had to remove the Google Adsense thingy as I was always finding inappropriate ads on my site. One once read 'boys in tights' I mean really what the?

family affairs said...

Glad your not the only one who seems to scare the male commenters off - although try writing an article about sheds - you'd be amazed! Lx

Half Mum Half Biscuit said...

I've given you a thank you mention over at mine. And this is just a virtual world - right? - so you won't be too disappointed if I don't send a 'real' six-pack of Chardonnay? x

Mum's the word said...

I haven't attempted the whole 'make money on my blog' thing yet, but loved this little anecdote.
Good to have a chuckle before bed.
Um...no red lights here!
xx

dulwich divorcee said...

Oooh, Womanatwork, don't knock boys in tights. Now you're talking!

Family affairs, your shed is so bijou I quite feel like moving in myself. I'm not sure I'm ready for the shed tactic, I fear I'd just get the sort of man with a deep interest in sheds ....

dulwich divorcee said...

HMHB, I'm off over to yours to read on ....I'm afraid I will be heartbroken if the Chardonnay is only virtual, but I shall carry on bravely, with only a trembling lower lip giving away my emotions (what a trouper!)

dulwich divorcee said...

MTW, I'm really not sure it's possible to make shedloads of money with a blog, unless you write a lot about sheds of course .....in fact I had my shed dismantled, chopped into small bits and taken away last summer, that was obviously a big mistake ....

Yummy Mammy said...

Nothing like a good bit of being inappropriate to make us all laugh.

I always find that the keywords report is funny reading, and the bizarre search terms of how people find me xx

Hadriana's Treasures said...

Hope you are OK DD...Google ads or not?! An award for you over at mine. Hx

Jennysmith said...

Hi. Yes, I was goin to monetise my blog - or whatever they call it.
But the adverts for loans and that turned my stomach a bit.

Mind you, yours and other's blogs always seem to have quite discreet and tasteful adverts. xxx

Brit in Bosnia / Fraught Mummy said...

You have to wonder about googles ability to target their adverts.. the closest to red lights we get is, er, white. Energy efficient ones obviously...

itsasmallworldafterallfamily said...

I was wondering about 'monetizing' (is that a real word?) my blog too. I think I'll give it a miss. Apart from anything else, $6 wouldn't keep me in mangoes.

Steve said...

Hi,

Do you have an email address where I can send you something?

Many Thanks

Steve
stevec@cakegroup.com

Tara@Sticky Fingers said...

Blimey, so that's where I've been going wrong.
It just begs the question, who the heck is reading your blog? Or which mummy has something she's not telling us?

dulwich divorcee said...

Hi Yummy, I know what you mean about those key words, sometimes it really seems like Blogger has a naughty sense of humour! How's it going with you? Must pop in and get an update xx

Hadriana, haven't seen you for yonks! Hope all's well, I must drop in and get an update. An award! My dear, you shouldn't have - but I'm glad you did xx

dulwich divorcee said...

Hi Jennysmith, I know what you mean ....I live in hopes of being sponsored by Cadbury's, though x

dulwich divorcee said...

BiB, lovely to see you, you're putting me to shame with your energy efficient ways! Must get down to ikea to stock up on their 'green' bulbs ...

dulwich divorcee said...

Hi It's a small ...., I know, the whole blog/ad thing is a bit more trouble than it's worth, I think ..I'm not sure there is money in them thar blogging hills really so am just enjoying the virtual cups of tea (and chardonnay) with friends ....

dulwich divorcee said...

Hi Steve (oooh look, it's a man!), yes, you can email me, are you going to send cake?

dulwich divorcee said...

Hi Tara, yes, it's most mysterious isn't it? I think someone's not telling us something they should be telling us about something they don't want to talk about .....or something x

EmmaK said...

please do email me how to get these adverts on my blog (seriously)

dulwich divorcee said...

EmmaK, what are you like?? Seriously, I have no idea what I did - try pressing every button in 'monetize' and maybe some sexy ladies will come your way .....